


Countdown

by Senket



Series: Matrimonial Complexity [5]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Episode: s05e06 The Shrine, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-13
Updated: 2011-02-13
Packaged: 2017-11-16 14:47:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/540620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Senket/pseuds/Senket
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's hope as long as enough of Rodney remains- a game of prime/not prime.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Countdown

“Because…” he screwed his eyes shut, concentrating very hard. “Because we’re married, right?”

Taken aback, John stifled a moan, laughing instead- it was hollow and brittle- “of all things, you remember a joke like that, buddy?”

He felt the man’s fingers tense on his arm. Thus far he’d considered himself quite lucky. He’d yet to deal with the pain of sitting there while the man stared at him without certainty, while Rodney tried to eke out who this maybe-stranger maybe-friend was, if that person was actually familiar. If he was remembering them correctly.

Teyla had shut herself in her room, alone, for a long stretch of time the first time Rodney had squinted at her and, gibbering with misery, said “Teyla, you’re A- …Ath- …um. Um.” And almost crying, giving up, “an alien, right?”  
No, Rodney never forgot his name, never even forgot his rank, though his active defenses seemed to have dropped faster than his IQ; Rodney always ran to him, screamed for him, if he started panicking, and for that he should count himself so lucky, but it hurt like a bitch.

He wondered if Rodney clung to the knowledge so they could have the proper goodbye he’d refused so vehemently.

“It’s not,” McKay moaned miserably, hiding his face against the muscle of John’s arm, “It’s not funny.”

He wondered if Rodney ever noticed that John never used his name anymore, if he wondered if it was because John was distancing himself slowly without ever actually saying goodbye, just in case: covering all his bases, resisting that breakdown just a little longer.

“What’s not funny?”

Rodney stared at him hard, probably trying to glare, though it looked maybe like a confused pout.  
He smiled casually and felt Rodney relax marginally against his arm, nudging him with his elbow until the man moved over enough to let him perch at the edge of the bed, stretching his legs. “Play a game?"

\----

“Come on, buddy, this one’s easy. 126,681. Prime or not prime?”

He smiled despite Rodney’s clear floundering, deliberately relaxing his muscles as the man’s strong fingers tightened around his upper arm. The once great Doctor McKay stared up at him, fearful and too astounded to be humiliated anymore, eyes open in horror as he gaped, mouth opening and closing like a fish. Rodney would never just venture a guess, not like Ford used to oh so long ago, because even in his deteriorating state of mind he wanted to know the right answer, he wanted to know why it was right, and he wanted to do it himself.

John swallowed down the mess of emotions Rodney’s desperation caused, tilting his head. “Okay, here’s how we do it. Is it divisible by two?”

“Of course not,” the man answered instantly, frowning and huffy and so put upon that John felt a flood of relief, at first, and then a little sick, because this still wasn’t anywhere close to being Rodney, who would have offhandedly given him an answer before rattling off a new number with only two factors, both three-digit primes.

“Okay. Is it divisible by three?” Rodney’s mouth shot open to answer, but he only frowned, wavering silently before slouching against the bedpan, hanging his head. He shrugged, muttering something no doubt unpleasant and no doubt directed at himself. John patted the man’s shoulder awkwardly, clearing his throat. Dropping as his IQ was, Rodney still knew that people were different around him, careful; John thought that was probably what hurt him the most, knowing that not only was he losing what he considered to be his primary and perhaps solitary point of worth, but that he was hurting other people doing it. Forcing them to put up with him.

Rodney had never been particularly good with understanding people, and John had never been particularly good at correcting people’s views, at least of his own feelings, but it just felt all wrong.

“No, no, buddy. You know this trick. You’re just so used to doing it without thinking about it that it’s slipped your mind. Come on.” Rodney looked up at him, a little mutinous and a lot distraught, half-glaring between his arms. “One plus two plus six plus…”

Gradually he watched the man’s expression change, pride tightening his throat as he saw understanding glean across Rodney’s face, a crooked smile and glitter of excitement whenever he solved a problem. “Not prime!”

John didn’t fight the smile breaking out on his face, ruffling the man’s wispy hair. “Right in one, buddy. Here’s a prize for you.” He grinned and handed Rodney a blue controller, pulling both toy cars out of his bag to settle them on the ground- almost immediately, McKay’s car smashed sideways into his before taking off in circles, disappearing between equipment and under the bedpan in imaginary laps. John lifted his feet off the ground, because it was safest that way, draping his legs across Rodney’s bed frame, and raced against him for a while.


End file.
